Long Story Long

Early in my junior year of high school (2015) I had a conversation with my good friend Stan while working on an anatomy project, about a summer exchange trip to Spain he had taken over the summer. Travel has always intrigued me and I asked him many more questions than he probably wanted or expected, but that was fine because he loves to talk. In particular, he loves to talk about that trip to Spain.

                He explained that a representative had come into his French class and presented on a scholarship opportunity to spend 3 weeks living in France with a host family. Stan applied for the France trip, interviewed, and was then told that if he accepted the scholarship they offered him, he would be going to a Spanish acquisition summer camp in Spain, rather than to a host family in France. He took a chance even though he had been studying French not Spanish and went to summer camp in a castle near Madrid. He loved every minute of it.

                He told me the name of the company that had sponsored him and I went home and spent hours trying to find the website. I never found it and after a few days, I forgot about it.

                Flash forward to January. (2016)

                I had just had my tonsils out. Literally. Like that morning. I was home, higher than a kite and struggling to sleep. I got a text from Taylor, the kid that sat next to me in Spanish class. A representative had come into our Spanish class while I was gone and presented on a scholarship opportunity to spend 3 weeks living with a host family in Spain, France or China. The only requirement was to create an art project and agree to host a Chinese student for a few weeks in the summer.  He said that the application deadline was soon and gave me a website (the one I had looked and looked and looked for but never found.) Taylor said that it “Didn’t really sound like something I (Taylor) would enjoy, but it sounded like something you (me, Boston) would be interested in.”

                I was high out of my mind, but coherent or not, I couldn’t understand why he (or anyone) wouldn’t be interested in a free trip to a foreign country. (I still can’t.)

                I was high out of my mind but I spent the next couple of days trying to not only put together an application, but to convince Taylor to do the same. (All while trying not to fall asleep into my mashed potatoes.)  It was not easy to put an application together on pain killers. It was not easy to convince Taylor to apply. His parents didn’t want to host a Chinese student. “You have nothing to lose by applying, you hardly have a chance, what’s the worst that could happen?” I asked. (Famous last words.) We both struggled through the application process, and finally his dad gave him permission to turn in an application, thinking there was no way anything would come of it.

                Taylor was picked to have a skype interview.

                I was not. (I did the whole thing on heavy pain meds. What chance did I actually have?)

                His interview went great and a few days later, he was given the amazing news that he had been picked to go to that same summer camp in Madrid.

                I think I was happier than he was. (At this point I should probably mention we had become pretty good friends through this whole thing.) He was excited, but nervous. More than once between February when he learned he was going and July when he actually left he said to me “I wish it was you.” If you ask him about it now, he will talk your ear off just like Stan will (and listening to them talk about that summer camp to each other is right on the borderline of annoying, but mostly it’s super cool.) Before he left though, he was so nervous. His parents weren’t happy about becoming a host family either. But he went. And I was so happy for him but so jealous. (I was jealous of Stan too, let’s be real.) Taylor had an amazing time in Spain and met so many cool people. His pictures are sooooo cool and I hope to someday visit that beautiful country. He grew up a lot while he was gone too.

                Flash forward to December. (Still 2016)

                2017 was my high school graduation year, but it was also my momma’s college graduation year. So, as a birthday/Christmas/graduation trip, my mom found cheap plane tickets and on Christmas my mom told me that we were going to China together.

                I was ecstatic.

                January 2017.

                Taylor decided that he was going to apply again to AILI and see if he could go again. (“What do I have to lose?” he said as he carefully avoided telling his mom he was submitting another application.) It was my senior year and I didn’t even consider applying because I was 18 and graduating. There was no way I was even eligible. Suddenly roles were reversed as Taylor worked to convince me to check the age limit and apply again.

                With the application to AILI you have to submit an art project. My first project (the one where I had just had my tonsils out, been super sick and then taken to the ER for potential drug overdose) was a photo collage because I was simply not mentally or physically capable of anything more. Don’t get me wrong, that collage was cool, but the point of the project is to make your application stand out. That one didn’t. That first project was boring and just like everyone else. The second time I applied, I wrote an essay.

                BORING!

                You think I’m joking, I’m not. Boring as it sounds, I wrote a piece about the universal language. I was picked for a skype interview. During that interview, they told me that my essay was above and beyond any application essay they had ever seen. They talked to me for almost double the amount of time they were scheduled for. Honestly, I left that interview feeling like I had made some new friends. (I wish every interview felt like that.) I thought for sure I was going to be one of the scholarship winners and get to go stay in that beautiful castle that Stan and Taylor had shown me amazing pictures of.

                On February 14^th, my mom and I mailed off our visa applications for China.

                On February 17^th, I was super sick. I had been throwing up all day and had not even managed to get up the stairs. I spent the whole day in bed and in the bathroom. It was a terrible day. Late that night, my terrible day turned around.

                I got a phone call from an out of state number and my heart started racing. (what else is new?) The program coordinator called to tell me that they liked my application and had loved my interview. They picked me.

“You don’t get your first choice though. We can’t send you to Spain. However, we have picked you to go to China if you’re interested. The only extra thing with China is, you have to get a visa to go in your passport, do you think you can do that?” she asked.

I couldn’t help but laugh a little to myself as I told her that a visa wouldn’t be a problem and that I couldn’t wait. They picked me. It was real. It is real. I am going to spend 3 weeks living with a host family in Shanghai.

I never did tell them about my trip to Beijing with my momma back in April. I doubt they would’ve cared. When I tell people that I just went to China and now I am going back, they get a little confused. I usually try make the long story short as I explain my scholarship. It’s too crazy of a story and feels just a little bit like something out of a book or movie. Stuff like this doesn’t happen in real life. There you go, now you know the long story. (and the story of how Taylor and I became such good friends.)

When I was 12 I traveled to Washington DC as a student ambassador by myself. My mom was super scared and I didn’t really get nervous until the night before. This time, my mom is totally chill, but I am a little anxious about traveling to a foreign country and living with strangers for a few weeks. I am so excited, but I am scared too.

It was amazing to see the change in Taylor when he came home from Spain. He learned and grew so much. I am excited to learn and grow myself. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and that God has a hand in everything. I often wonder why I am going to China and not Spain. I am anxiously excited to find out. I often hear people say the phrase “nothing to lose.” Right now however, I am excited at the idea of everything I have to gain.

If you are a high school student ages 14-18 who is interested in applying for a free trip to Italy, France, Spain or China, check out this website!

Follow my trip on Instagram! @boston_sassachusetts 

My very late graduation speech.

Back in April I tried out to give a graduation speech. My speech was not chosen and I was very sad. My good friend Taryn was chosen instead. Sad as I was about the missed opportunity, her speech was much better than mine and I am honestly glad they chose hers. However, I usually share the writings I am most proud of. If anyone is interested, here is my speech:

Sophomore year I took Honors Chemistry and Mrs. Embleton insisted that before she will give me my diploma, Mrs. Warr will first ask me what Earth’s atmospheric makeup is. I hope she was lying, but just in case, it’s 78% nitrogen and 21% oxygen.

Thank goodness that wasn’t the only thing I learned. Real fast, just to name a few more things I had to memorize throughout high school: The mitochondria is the power house of the cell, Ligaments connect bone to bone, and I learned the quadratic equation. I learned SOAPstone and un poco espanol and that the House of Representatives has 435 members and the Senate has 100 members.

But facts weren’t the only thing we learned because high school is an educational experience on more than one front. I learned how to do my homework to fit what a teacher is looking for, which my mom says is one of the most important things she learned in college.  I learned which drinking fountains had the coldest water and I learned the best places to take naps in the school.  I learned how to push teacher’s buttons on a personal level. (For that I apologize to every teacher that ever had me, in particular I’d like to apologize to Mr. Henry.) I learned how to laugh when people ask me about embarrassing stories from sophomore year. (If you haven’t heard my chick pick story, you’re missing out.) I learned that you won’t remember the sleep you lost but you will remember the grade you got, another lesson I plan to take with me to college.

I learned that being smart is incredibly important, but I also learned that being smart will only get you so far. This world is full of people. People are what matter in this world. Social skills are so much more important than many people realize and while you can make up for not being the smartest by being kind, it is much harder to make up for being rude by being smart.  If you can’t be friends with people who are different than you, then you’re in for a rude awakening.

Relationships that matter are never going to be easy. That goes for families, friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, roommates, pets, everyone. If you want someone in your life, make it apparent. It’s hard to be vulnerable. But being vulnerable is what makes people real and beautiful. Owning your shame and living your life with open arms to love and accept yourself and love and accept others is incredibly liberating and incredibly powerful.

 Everyone here graduating has a little bit of “I want to change the world” inside them. If I’ve learned anything about this world, it’s that you don’t have to single handedly change the world or single handedly change people. You just have to show people that you love them and they will change both on their own.

Along with that I’d like to say that Mental health matters. Your life matters. You matter. I’m going to make a bold statement and say that I think that almost every single person in this room will one day find themselves standing in a mental hospital, if they haven’t already done it. You might be there for an appointment, or you might be admitted. Or maybe you will be visiting your best friend. It might be your spouse or your child. Maybe it will be a parent or a sibling. I won’t lie to you, it will probably be a little scary, but it is not the end. Life goes on. Life gets better. Love goes on. Hope is real. Decide to care about your own health and the health of the people that matter to you. Deciding to care changes the quality of the outcome big time.

We will all leave today and head on our own way in different directions to different places. For some of us, the next step is college or trade school. For others it’s a mission. Maybe for you the next step is getting married. Some of us aren’t sure yet, and that’s okay too. There isn’t one right answer.

Take a chance, and say “yes” to something you are afraid to do. Stand up for yourself and say “no” when you have to, no still means no.  Even though we are now “real adults” it’s still okay to say “I don’t know.” Even though more people will be depending on us more from here on out, it is still okay to say “I’ll get back to you.” Like when your parents ask when you’re going to move out and stop eating all their food, say “I don’t know, I’ll get back to you.”

Even though we are now “real adults” it’s still okay to be afraid. Change is scary. Letting go of things that are comfortable is scary. But it is scarier if you don’t control the things you can control. If you don’t like where you are in life, change it. Don’t let life drag you forward. Step up and start making decisions. Baby steps are okay, but make them purposeful baby steps.

You are smart. You are capable. You have more power than almost everyone in all of human history. You can wake up every day and take a hot shower with clean water. You can hold all kinds of incredible information about the universe in the palm of your hand. You are powerful. Do something with that power. We live in a time where we as humans are creating and solving problems with incredible speed. All I am asking you to do is solve more problems than you create.

Life very rarely goes as planned. Learn to be flexible. Learn to roll with the punches. Sometimes the best things come from the biggest trials and the most unlikely circumstances. As crazy and chaotic as life is, someday we will all find happiness and find exactly what we’re looking for in life. Or we won’t. I sincerely hope we all find something better than we could’ve possibly imagined.

I’d like to close on a bit of a lighter note if that’s okay by saying: Don’t give advice, because it always comes back to bite you and don’t take advice because it never works. So, here’s my advice. Hydrate, exfoliate, and prioritize your assignments to finish them in order of when they are due. In other words: Hydrate. Exfoliate. Procrastinate.